For the Woman Wondering If Love Will Find Her (Will I Ever Get Married)

Waiting for love is exhausting.

Sometimes it looks like scrolling past engagement photos, attending weddings with a smile, or answering the same questions about your relationship status. For me it looked like dating with intention, while my prospects were only interested in dating “casually”.

But mostly it’s a silent wondering of: will I ever get married?

If you’re single and tired, this story is for you.

The Season I Was In Before I Met Him

About a year before I met my husband, I decided to take a break from dating. After getting it wrong for so many years, learning to be by myself just felt like the right step. The COVID-19 pandemic unintentionally supported this choice since everything was closed, and life slowed down.

During this year I lived in an in-between space. I wasn’t desperate, but I wasn’t really at peace either. I had moments of genuine contentment and moments when I felt like I should be doing more to make marriage a possibility for me. 

I had done the self-work, read enough books, and attended all the singles events. Marriage wasn’t something I wanted to force, but it was definitely something I desired and also felt ready for.

That year of true singleness I was simply growing… and living.

But sometimes, “simply living” can feel confusing when the world tells you that love only comes when you’re doing enough.

What I Wrote Before I Had Any Idea What Was Coming

Two days before the trip that would unknowingly change my life, I sat down and wrote in my journal.

Not with certainty, but with surrender.

The entry was dated April 6, 2021 and it began like this:

“I literally have no idea where my life is going or what’s next for me.”

I went on to write that my prayer wasn’t for a specific outcome, but that whatever was ahead would exceed anything I could imagine, even the things I didn’t know to ask for.

I wrote about trusting God through uncertainty. About choosing faith, even when my emotions shifted. About believing that my life a year from then could look drastically different than it did that day.

At the time, I didn’t choose those words thinking marriage was around the corner.

I wrote them because I had reached a place where I genuinely wanted God’s will, whether that meant marriage or continued singleness. I wrote them because I was tired of trying to control my own outcome.

How I Actually Met My Husband

Back in 2021, I was roommates with my sister. Like so many people during the pandemic, we really wanted a change of scenery after being indoors for so long...so we booked flights to Florida.

Not long after we booked our flights, a dear friend of mine messaged me. She told me that she and my cousin (her God-sister) were also going to Florida… on the exact same dates my sister and I had already booked flights for! She asked if we wanted to meet up.

Of course, we did.

So we all met in Miami. That very same day, my friend told me about a guy she had met through Hinge. They had gone on a few dates, but she knew he wasn’t right for her.

She felt he was meant for me. I didn’t overthink it. I was simply open to having a conversation with him.

That same day, she texted him my information.

And the rest, is history.

What stands out to me now though isn’t how we met…but when.

It happened in the middle of an ordinary season.

On a trip I didn’t plan for love.

At a moment when I had already made peace with the outcome.

I Had to Give up Something to Gain Something Greater

I didn’t meet my husband because I finally "did things right".

I met him through friendship.

Through someone else being open and obedient in her own life.

But most importantly I met him because I stopped wrestling with the idea of marriage, slowed down, and gave up my ideal future for God’s will for my life.

What This Season Taught Me About Timing

For a long time, I believed timing was something that I should control.

That if I didn’t stay alert, I might miss my chance.

That trust had to be balanced with effort, or else love would pass me by.

But my story taught me something different.

Timing isn’t something we control.

It’s something we walk into.

I didn’t meet my husband at the exact moment I thought I would. I met him when I finally decided to show up to life as it was.

Love arrived when I finally learned to just trust.

“Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; And lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, And he shall direct thy paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6

A Word for the Woman Who Feels Behind

If you’re reading this and wondering if you’ve missed your moment:

You haven’t.

Your life is not on pause.

Your story is not delayed.

And your worth is not measured by how quickly your relationship status changes.

Waiting does not mean wasting. And preparation does not always look like effort.

Sometimes it looks like openness and a trust that God has your future under control.

What I Hope You Take From This

I hope this story reminds you that love doesn’t always arrive when or how we want it to.

It may come while you’re going through every day life.

It could begin with a text message you won’t think twice about.

And yet, these are the moments that could change everything.

If you’re single and tired of waiting, I hope you know this:

Your life is full of meaning, and this season you’re in is so valuable...even if it doesn't feel that way yet.

The most important thing you can do right now isn’t to rush toward an outcome, but to be present. To enjoy the life in front of you, while placing your future in God’s hands.

Whether love comes, or whether singleness remains, God is enough. He is the steady presence holding your life together.

Final Encouragement

If you’re in a season of waiting, whatever it may be, just know that you are not forgotten.

And your story doesn’t need to look like anyone else’s to be beautiful.

If this story resonated with you, I’d love to hear from you. Leave a comment or send me a message, I read every one.